SINGLE mother

I am a single morther.  While I love my mother title, I loathe the single part of it.  I pretty much hate everything about being single.  I'm just going to go ahead and make a bulleted list of why I hate being single, because I'm not already feeling crappy enough today.

 

I hate being single because-

• I hate sleeping by myself... I love to cuddle and well, it's hard to do that with yourself
• It's hard to cook.   My kids don't like my cooking (maybe because my kitchen doesn't have golden arches outside) so I always have way too much left over
• All my friends are married... 3rd wheel anyone?
• I get to hear my friends complain about how bad their husbands are
• I get to hear my friends gloat about how good their husbands are... either way it sucks
• The only people I talk to at night are 5 and under... conversations are intellectual at my house
• Austin needs more of a male influence.  He likes purple sequin pants, enough said
• I like hanging out with my friends and their husbands.  My friends picked some pretty good guys, but since I don't have a man we always just hang out with the girls.  I know it's nice for them to to have a girls night, but it would be nice to be around guys again.
• I HATE DATING... the only thing I hate more than not having a date, is going on a date.  I don't like the getting to know you stage... I wish I could just skip that part of it all or just do it with ONE more person.
• My house is cleaner when I live with someone. 
• Seriously the sleeping part... I didn't sleep last night.

 

Don't get me wrong, I love my life.  I am lucky in so many ways.  I know that it will happen when and if it's supposed to happen.  I also know that I have been married twice, and some people would argue that I have had my fair share of husbands.  I'm getting the used to the idea that I might be single for a while, and maybe, eventually, I might be ok with it.  In the mean time, I am focussing on my children. I have a blast with them and I know I don't need a boyfriend... it would just be nice. I am not going to settle.  I am etither going to be someone that fits into my life just as well as I fit into theirs.  I will be with someone that will be there for my children.  I don't expect what happened with my mom and dad to happen, although it would be nice. Sometimes I let that little voice in my head(ok big voice) take over and wonder what's wrong with me or what's wrong with the guys I'm meeting.  What it boils down to is that there is nothing wrong with me or them(most of them)... it just wasn't the right fit or the right time, or a little of both.  All I can do is be the best me I can be and let the rest just happen.