Day 12

How I found out about blogger and why I created one

hmmmm I dunno how I found it, but I used to just look at random ones and press next, next, next, next, next for hours.  I used to look at craft blogs, then food blogs, then running blogs, more food blogs.... organic now.

I like to read about people's lives that share so freely.

I made one first to write about the kids... fail

I did another with my crafts... fail

Now this... going ok I think

Day 11

Or should I say post 11? haha

Another picture of me and my friends. 

Kinda fuzzy and missing one friends, but that will hopefully be fixed soon.

I love these girls.  I am so lucky to have worked and played with them.  

I am sad that we got split up, but lucky that we got the time we had together.

I know we will stay friends and watch each other's kids grow up.

I am lucky that I have 3 more forever friends!

Day 10

Songs I listen to when I am Happy, Sad, Bored, Hyped, Mad

I thought I would just go ahead and post this because it's so easy.  

I just listen to whatever is on the Sirius radio.  Sometimes I flip through some channels and it fits.  I have an OLD iPod, but I don't keep it updated and I don't ever use it.  I love music and listen to Pandora a lot.  I just kinda go with the flow and let the music decide. 

Day 9

Something I'm proud of in the past few days

I can't say I'm proud of posting for the challenge when I should!  Theresa is doing awesome though!!

   I am proud of my little boy though.  He got 3 green faces this week!  He is loving being able to tell me he had a good day when I pick him up.  I am so happy for him and his teacher!!  I better grades for behavior in his future.

Day 8

Short term goals for this month...

I guess I will talk about next month.  This would be a reason we should have started at the beginning of the month.  Ha!  

I wore something different to work and wore makeup every day this month.  I'm proud!

1. Stop procrastinating with my school work Who am I kidding?? That will never happen!!!

1. Wear a scarf in a different way ever day.  This will entail getting some more scarves.  YAY!

2. Keep my A average in my classes.  That's do-ish able 

3. Keep fixing my hair.  Every since I did my 30 different hairstyles in September, I haven't just worn my hair down without doing something to it.  If you know me you know that's a HUGE deal.  

Day 7

 A picture of someone/something that has the biggest impact on me

I am just going to go ahead and be that mom.... but honestly they have changed my life for the better.  I have learned patience, kindness, and true love.  

Day 6

My favorite Superhero...

I like batman.  I don't remember a time when I didn't like batman.  I like the movies and the cartoons.  Never been big on comics, but if someone had them- I'd read them.  

I like batman because he is a normal guy with cool toys and a fast car.  

Day 5

A picture of somewhere I've been.

Again forgive me for not posting on the actual day... It's been a hard week. 

I love San Francisco.  I love the fog.  I love the people.

Day 4

A habit I wish I didn't have. 

Man... this could be so many things, but since I have to pick on I will go with tardiness.  I do not want to be early all the time, I would just like to be ON time for often. Since is the one of the bad habits that I have that tends to hinder my job performance I going with this one.  I need to do better. 

Day 3

A picture of me and my friends

I love these girls so much!  I am so lucky to still be friends with all of them.

Day 2

The meaning of my blog name... The little things

    Today is another reason I believe that everything happens for a reason.  Today is a day I needed to remember the meaning behind my blog name.  I strive to find the good in everything and the little things in life really do make me happy.  I do sometimes lose my way.  

   Today was a day I felt lost.  I am about to go through a change at my job- a change that I did not expect and did not want.  The news of this change made me very sad and angry.  Everyone around me was trying to make me feel better, but I wasn't wanting any part of it.  I left work feeling very disenchanted. 

    Everyone knows I love my job... bosses, co-workers, flexibility, laughter... everything.  I am still very fearful that it will change for the worse, but there is nothing I can do about it.  I need to focus on the good and be happy about the little things.  I still have a job.  I do not have to relocate to keep said job.  

    After work I picked up Megan... her yelling MOMMY! and running into my arms made my day just a little better.  I got to ride home listening to her sing... little more better.  I picked up Austin and I see another green face... a lot better.  We go to his school for his fall festival and I see his old teacher.  She looks like one of those old wicked teachers.  Then we run into his current teacher... He runs and hugs her and I can tell they are both happy to see each other... SO MUCH BETTER.  My son is finally able to sit still in class and so many people at his school love him.  Everyone wanted to talk to me about him.  How can I be sad when I see how happy he is?  We walk to the car, hand in hand- in a pattern child-adult-child.  My children are healthy and happy and I am lucky.  It's the little things... balloon popping, cake walking, face painting, bean bag tossing, pop corn, slushies, and way too much candy little things.  

   Thank you Theresa for doing this blog challenge.  I am happy that we decided not to wait to start.  I needed this today and it is just another reason I am lucky to have you as a Best Friend.

Day 1

Does it still count for day one if I wrote it yesterday?
A recent picture and 15 interesting(ish) facts about myself.
Recent as in today

1. I'm half adopted and so lucky
2. I love hanging out with my family. 3. I am starting to eat almost everything local and organic
4. I am a full time student- computer science... I'm crazy
5. I work full time as a help desk technician... best job ever
6. I didn't want kids... until I met Austin then I didn't know what I would have done without him
7. I didn't want a daughter... until I met Megan now I think everyone should get to have a girl
8. I am obsessed with huge earrings... bigger the better
9. I love watching football, college and pro... more than a lot of guys I know
10. I like every single card/board game I have ever played except for rook and trivial pursuit
11. Pretty much the only time I am not using some sort of electronic device is when I'm sleeping
12. I am still friends with my three best friends from High School
13. I love driving a car with a manual transmission... maybe a little too fast 14. I've had four different parts of my boy pierced... only one still is
15. I love tv... especially dramas... but I hate drama in real life.

Hard decisions

One of the many things I have learned since I've become a parent is that it's filled with hard decisions.  Sometimes it just plain sucks.  There have been many times that I've wanted to do something fun but couldn't because of something they were getting punished for.  I am a big kid at heart so I want it to be fun fun fun all the time.  Truth is- someone has to be the grown up.  We drew straws and I got stuck with it.  Well guess what... we can't eat ice cream for dinner every night.  Oh how I wish that was the hardest decision I ever had to make.  Another thing you start to realize is the decisions that you make will mold them into the person they will someday become.  All you can do is the best you can and hope that everything will be fine.  Everyone knows Austin has been having a hard time.  For the longest time I blamed it on myself.  I thought  there was something else that I could do.  There had to have been something that I was missing that would make it all turn around and he would be fine.  Why couldn't he just listen?  Why couldn't he just focus.  It's not that hard.  Maybe for some kids it's not that hard, but for Austin it is.  Austin has a good heart.  He wants to listen.  He wants to make me happy.  He knows what he needs to do, but I have really come to the conclusion that he can't.  I'm not a doctor, obviously, but I know there is something wrong.  It's not a discipline problem.  It's definitely not like this because of lack of trying.  There is just something missing... something off.  I thought for a long time if I took him to the doctor and they told me he had to be on medication that I had failed.  I thought I should be able to fix it.  I avoided taking him because I didn't want them to tell me I was a failure.  Truth is- if there is something out there that will make his life easier, I am failing him by not allowing it to happen.  It's not about me.  It is about this sweet little boy that needs help.  He shouldn't have to be in trouble all the time.  He should be able to get green faces and have camp outs.  He is one of the two greatest things I have ever done and I should do everything in my power to help him be the best he can be.  Maybe he doesn't have ADHD, maybe it's something else, but whatever it is we need to know and we need help dealing with it.  I will get him whatever help he needs and do whatever I need to do.... for him

Avocado Experiment

Thanks to my wonderful grandmother I had 6 avocados in my fridge.  I wanted to make each and every one of them into a smoothie.  What I decided to do was a little experiment.  I wanted to try to use them in a variety of new ways.  First one I tried tonight was avocado deviled eggs.  They are so yummy!  

I am obsessed with pinterest!!!  I love looking at what people like and what inspires them.  I got my friend EE hooked on it today.  I love how she gets excited about things like I do.  

I talked to a friend for 4 hours last night.  Made me really realize how much a miss having a man in my life.  I know I don't need a man.  I am perfectly fine without one, but I don't even really have any guys that I hang out with.  I'm not really used to that.  I have always gotten along better with guys and there is just a different dynamic.  I hate having the feeling that something is missing... Don't get me wrong I am happy, just more aware of that empty part of my life at the moment.      

We don't quit

Austin hates football.  I wanted so bad for him to love it.  He hates wearing a helmet because his head itches.  He doesn't like the pads because he thinks he looks funny.  I think he's adorable!

I hate seeing him struggle on the field, but he needs to learn.  He will not quit.  He will run when he acts crazy and I will run with him.  I don't expect him to do anything I wouldn't do.  

His school hired a new teacher and they put him in her class.  So far it seems like a better fit.  He got a smiley face and a straight face.... instead of sad faces or no faces at all.  I know that it's hard for him.  I know he will struggle.  We just have to work together.  He's a lot like I was and I know it gets better.  

On a lighter note... Megan was beat boxing this afternoon.  I asked her who taught her.  She said she taught herself.  She cracks me up.  She is my sweet little girl.  

Austin had a better day at school on Friday... still wasn't a good day, but at least it was better.  I went to bed early on Friday then ran did a 5k Saturday morning.  I napped most of the day after that and then I finally got to go to Bonefish with my mom and step-dad. Dinner was AWESOME!  Bang bang shrimp is as good as everyone says.  Then I took my first trip to a make your own and pay by weight fro-yo place.

YUMMY!!

I also got to hang out with my sister and Dorothy for a while.  I ended up spending the night with my sister and then going to go see GLEE!!!

Austin and I talked a lot about how he is going to act at school.  Hopefully something got through his thick little skull.  I have a feeling that he is going to be a lot like me... hopefully we will both get through it alive. 

And now thanks to Theresa I am now hooked on Switched at Birth.  At least I returned the favor with Make it or Break it.  Gotta love ABC Family!  

Principles and Principals

Austin got sent to the principal's office today.  I was hoping we weren't going to go this route, but at least he waited a couple days.  His teacher turned out to be kind of a push-over.  That was something I was dreading.  The principle of the point is though, he should be able to listen no matter what.  I went and talked to the principal, who luckily was super nice about everything.  I told her I am working very hard with him.  I had a serious talk with him pretty much all afternoon.  He was a million times better at football practice, so maybe he will have a better day tomorrow.  They are in the process of hiring another kindergarten teacher.  I told her to put him with the teacher that is going to lay down the law.  Hopefully the teacher they hire is a bit of a hard ass.

I wish he would act as cute as he looks all the time!  We will get through this and he will have better days.  Hopefully they outnumber the bad ones!  I am not going to be easy on him.  That isn't what he needs.  It's hard for me, but it will be better for him in the long run.

Insanity

Shit just got real y'all.   I sat down today and wrote out my schedule for the next couple months.  I really think I am a crazy person.  Like ape shit crazy.  Pretty much every minute of everyday is booked during the week.  I do not work one regular day all week.  I either work more or less than 8 hours.  I have to shift my time around because of my class that I go to twice a week during work hours. Have I mentioned how lucky I am to have the job I do?  Yes?  Ok, we will move on. I am about to be a full time student while I work a full time job... all while being a single parent of two lovely children.  Austin is in more than one sport.  I think it's worth it.  

How cute is this dude?

Don't let him fool you though... He was a big fat whiner in that getup.  He kept asking any adult in sight to scratch his neck. Buuuut Moooooommmmmmy I'm iiiiiiitchiiiiiing.  I am pretty sure whining is annoying to everyone, but it drives me INSANE.  Luckily he was on the other side of the fence.  Mommy might have had to teach him what a face mask penalty was... or at least that would have been my excuse. So it was hot and it was raining and he is 5 but come on.  

We went to Austin's orientation today.  He asked while we were in the classroom if he could go explore.  Is he Dora now?  The teacher said he would have to learn the rules of the classroom before he could touch anything.  I think I am going to like her!  He told me that he is going to miss his school(daycare) because he likes playing more than learning.  I told him that learning will be fun.  I don't think he believed me.  

I really hope I live until Christmas.  I think the extra money from the GI bill will soften the blow.  Rest assured that I am scheduling my workouts too.  It would be a lot easier if I had someone to watch them while I got in my weekend workouts.... 

My favorite little girl

One of my role models is my daughter.  I would love to be as self confident, happy and friendly as her.  She definitely finds happiness in the little things.  This is a list of things that made her happy tonight.

1. She could lay with mommy when she was supposed to be going to bed
2. Not going to sleep
3. Watching her brother play games... she loves watching everything he plays
4.  Playing with her friend- one of many she has already made at football practice
5. Catching butterflies- I have no idea when she did this.  She says she was trying at school
6. Playing downstairs.

I really believe the key to being happy is finding joy in the little things.  I also know a huge part of a child's happiness is the whole lack of responsibility thing.  I am just glad that I get to be around this chick everyday.

And this guy is pretty bad ass too

Birthday parties and homemade pizza

Saturday was such a busy day!  We woke up early to go to Austin's soccer orientation.  His practices are on Tuesday and Saturday so at least he will be able to be at one of them.  His coach seemed excited he was on his team(I hope he wasn't faking it) I love that he is known!  He said he doesn't need much practice.  This should be a good season.... hopefully the games don't clash too much.

 

Then we went and signed up for the gym!  They had a moon bounce and had music playing.  Austin was entertaining everyone by trying to break dance.  He had everyone cracking up.  I didn't mind claiming him that day.  We were right on schedule to make it to the birthday party on time.

 

The birthday boy was so cute and the party was amazing.  The Cat in the Hat even made an appearance.  She had coloring sheets and frost your own cupcakes.  The kids had a blast.

 

 Austin is getting really good at making goofy faces for the blog.  Megan still needs practice.

 

I dropped them off at parent's night out and then met up with Amy K and my cousin.  We just had a low key night talking and playing pool.  I ended up spending the night with Amy K at my mom's.  My mom's bed is the most comfortable bed in the whole entire world.  Hi Mom... 

 

We wathed tv and napped all day.  We watched Toddlers and Tiaras. 

Oh Em Gee... some of those moms and kid are cah-ray-zee.  It's fun to watch though.

 

For dinner I made pizzas!  I bought some pizza crust from earthfare and did it all myself.  I did just cheese for the kids.  Mine had a pesto base with mozzarella cheese and spinach, mushrooms, chicken, avocado and of course a little bit of feta.  It was the best pizza I have EVER had.

Again with the gray bars... I dunno.

 

What is YOUR favorite pizza?

busy days and busy nights

Meet my new salad bowl

Yes I am aware that it is a casserole dish, but I am obsessed with spinach, feta and raspberry vinaigrette- insert many other ingredients depending on the day.  Today for lunch I had spinach and feta pizza along with it(told you I was obsessed).  I am surprised I didn't dip the pizza in the dressing.

I go to work late on Fridays and some of my programs were not working on my computer.  I almost forgot about the carnival.  Ok, ok, I did forget- one of my coworkers reminded me.  I am sure glad I didn't miss Austin hyped up on cotton candy... he kept saying but I've only had one- of everything- even when it was like 17 or Megan drunk on sugary drinks      

 

Can someone tell me why some of my pictures have a gray bar on the bottom?Later we went to see on of my best friends from high school.  This is a hard time for her right now and I wanted to hug her and let her know I am here for her.  I am not sure how she is about being talked about in blog land so I won't talk about that anymore.  After that we went to The Fresh Market.  I was not impressed.  I wanted to be, but it wasn't really that big of a deal.  Just seemed over priced to me.  I would much rather go to Earth Fare for the price.  After getting some groceries we went to the movie.  I am glad it didn't rain.So was Megan!     Tomorrow we have a soccer meeting.  Best case scenario is we have practices on Wednesday and Saturday.  I really hope that he can stay in soccer.  I know he will like it better than football, but we need to give football a try.  If he can't do both we will just wait for soccer in the spring.  After the meeting I am signing up for the gym.  Then we are going to a birthday party.  Then I have to work out.  Then I have plans tomorrow with my sister and cousin while they are at parent's night out.  I am so much happier when my days and nights are full.  I feel like way less of a lame-o.  

Meant to be?

I've been thinking for a while that I want to join a gym.  I have been struggling with it because I do have a place I can work out.  I didn't want to pay for a place when I could just work out at work.  

When I go to the gym at work there is this girl that walks on the treadmill.  I'm not mad at her cause at least she's exercising.  Buuuuuut she's always on the treadmill I like.  Aaaaaand she doesn't like music!  What is wrong with a person to where they wouldn't like music?!?!?!?  She always asks to turn the radio down- then you can't hear it.  So shouldn't someone RUNNING in the gym take precedence over someone that is simply walking?  I know I should have an iPod or something with headphones, but I don't and there is a radio for a reason right? I might have mentioned this already, but it's just that annoying.

Thing is I want to do more. I want to do classes and I want to use an Arc Trainer.  I found a gym that has a location near my job and my house.  They are building a new state of the art location suuuuper close to my house.  All their cardio machines have tv's on them.  I love that.  

I went for an orientation today at the gym.  They are having a membership drive on Saturday and you don't have to pay a registration fee.  I think there is something to say about the timing.  I think I am going to go on Saturday and join.  I HAVE to keep going to the gym if I'm paying for it... right?

While I was there I sat down for an evaluation to see if I wanted to do a weight loss program.  I weighed and she took my measurements.  When she got to the chest part I told her to just put huge... she laughed and said she wishes she had that problem.  She even did measurements of my calves and ankles.  I told her I would have shaved if I knew someone was going to get fresh with me.  It's sad cause that's the most action I'm had in months.      

Not always as it seems

This looks to me like cereal, cottage cheese and apples

It's yogurt that was frozen(not the fro-yo I would like), white peaches and granola.

Better than it looks, right?

I know I don't look like a chick that can runs much less can run 3 miles.

I can!

Football for a 5 year old? Practice 3 days a week 1.5 hours each!  That's a lot huh? Too much?  Not for Austin!  Maybe he'll get tired. Eh, probably not.

At practice they tell us we need a practice jersey, mouth guard, chin strap and practice pants with pads.  They say don't get the set because it's cheaper.  They tell me to get my husband to take the pads in and out for me to wash them.  Husband? I don't have one of those... now what?  And even if I did- why do you assume I am the one doing the laundry?  From the looks of it I am the only single mom on the team.  Aaaaawkward... 

It's one thing to be single and it's another to be a married mom...  but it's so weird to be a single mother.  How do I date and get that period of time where I am all into that person?  I am all into my kids.  I just don't see how it will ever happen.  I love how much we are doing and I love our little life.  I just can't help but think about what it could be like to have another adult to lean on while I do all this.  Someone's lap for me to lay my head on while we are at the drive-in.  Someone to help me with the effin pads for his pants.  Someone to help me get them ready in the morning.  Just someone...

As if I didn't have enough going on, I'm adding more.  I know I can handle it though.  Full time job and full time school?  Too much? Not for me.  It's hard for me to get stuff done unless I have "too much" going on.  If I think I have more than enough time I tend to procrastinate. 

I got dressed this morning, normal clothes, and I feel blah.  I get to work and he tells me I look good.  He always makes me smile.  I am thankful for him and all the other people in my life that make everything easier to handle. 

Who makes you smile?

New Favorite Sauce

So you remember that sauce I was talking about?  No?  I know it was years ago.  

Well it turned out amazing and even my friends at work like it.  I am quite proud.  

First I cut up an onion and yes I cried.

1 large onion and 2 cloves of garlic(maybe more I love garlic)
Cook in hot oil just until tender

I never knew how to peel a tomato without destroying it.

Boiling water 30 seconds... ice water until cool
Voilà! Skin peels right off!!

Then cut tomatoes into quarters and add to the pot with
1 1/2 cups water
6 oz tomato paste
1 tbsp sugar
2 tsp instant beef bouillon granules
1 tsp oregano
1/2 tsp crushed basil( I used fresh)
1/8 tsp pepper (I use the red/black combo)
1 bay leaf

after 1.5 LONG hours I use this

to make this

I hate chunky tomatoes, but you do as you like

You can serve like this but don't forget to take out the bay leaf

oooooooor add

this- 1 lb ground beef

and these wonderful mushrooms

I wanted to eat these all before they got to the sauce

I thought I was going to have to try a couple different recipes before I found a winner, but this was it!

I am going to make a LARGE batch and freeze it.  

Question... what kind of noodles are your favorite?

Mine are corkscrew, but I'm going to buy whole wheat noodles when I'm out. 

The Big 5k

This morning I woke up about 10 minutes before I was supposed to leave my house.  That means I was running about 20 minutes late.  Needless to say I was RUNNING around my house.  Can that count for my warm-up?
Austin- Are we going to day care?
Me-No, we are going to a race
Austin- Am I racing?
Me- No you are going to meet Mommy at the finish line like last time.
Austin- But Mom, That was taking FOREVER!
Me- I know buddy, I'll be faster soon.

Us before the race.  Isn't my bff pretty?  She wears make up to races.
Me? not so much. Apparently I don't pluck my eyebrows either.

Staying out late+lots of food+not a lot of sleep+HOT outside= sucky race.  It was not my worst time, but definitely not my best.  Normally at the beginning of the race, I scan the crowd for someone I KNOW I can beat.  Today there was no one with a baby carrier so I had to search harder.  I mean really, I let a dude pushing a wheel chair beat me at my second race.  I finally found an older lady with a gimp leg.  SUCCESS! I beat her... and a few others that I am sure were running their first race.
I'm pretty sure they called it The Big 5k, not because of Big Brother/Big sister, but because it was actually like 3.25 miles.  That's a big deal to this chick!

Us after the race
And no I didn't jump in the fountain to cool off after the race
I just sweat that much. Theresa- still gorgeous

After the race we went to the farmer's market.  I got some tomatoes, peaches, salsa and some other little things.  I also stopped by Earth Fare(expect anything else?) to get the rest of the stuff for the spaghetti sauce.  I will post about that later... after I try it.  If you don't hear back it sucked!

What do you do the day before/morning of that helps you have a good race?

Cinemagic Drive-In

After work yesterday I didn't feel like going straight home.  Hindsight tells me that I should have, but you live and learn right?  I called my sister and guilted her to meet me for dinner.  We met at Earth Fare. Have I been there everyday for the past 4 days? Yes. Have I given them more money than I care to admit? Yes.  Am I still happy I am eating better? Yes!!  I looked up movie times for the drive in and they were showing a double feature.  Winnie the Pooh and Cars 2!!!  I wanted to see Pooh and I knew the kids would enjoy seeing Cars 2 again.  We got snacks at Earth Fare before we left.  We went to Kreme Delite because apparently I am unable to go to Athens without making a stop there for ice cream. I wanted to capture the moment on camera, but I guess Austin wanted to be silly.

Dear Megan,

You must work on silly faces.

Love, 

Mom

Obviously I need to learn how to get my whole face in a picture. 

I ended up falling asleep at the end of Pooh and slept during most of Cars 2.  We got home waaaaay too late and I still needed to wash my clothes for the race.  Note to self, buy more running clothes.  I'm still glad we went, but tonight would have been better than last night for sure.  

Happy Tummy

I swear my mom can read my mind some times.  We were talking on Thursday(one of out million conversations) and she asked me if I wanted to go out to lunch the next day. Maybe that's not mind reading, just being observant, but good nonetheless. Uh Duh... I told her I wanted to try this place called Happy Tummy.  She exclaimed, "I have Groupons!"  Free Lunch Friday- that's my favorite.

When we got to the Lowe Mill we didn't know where to park or where to go when we went in.  That place is huge!!  I was so upset that I have never been there before, but happy that I found it and will be going back!  We finally found the place, on the other side of the building, and only 10 min after they opened there was a big line.

Me and My mom waiting in line.  She asked if it was for the blog... she's learning fast. :-)  No I'm not albino... I'm just not bff's with the sun and I am too lazy to wear make-up.

This place is awesome!  Fresh bread and a very interesting menu that changes every week.  Some of the choices this week were Bad Apple- turkey on Apple Bread, Don't Cry for Me Argen-tuna- tuna on a croissant, Stars Falafel on Alabama and What the Cluck?  The owner was hilarious.  Almost all our sandwiches were special orders and she said that we were "a bunch of pains in her ass"  She was older than my mom but she had rainbow colored hair.  I loved her!  This is definitely added to the list of approved restaurants!

Optimist

I guess you have to have a bad day every now and then to learn how to really appreciate the good ones.  I think my body had adjusted to the lack of caffeine.  Isn't it crazy how your whole entire mood can be impacted by one simple thing?  I read this post at hungryrunnergirl.  I loved this-   I don’t think that you have to be happy and cheery all of the time to be an OPTIMIST.  This is exactly how I feel about my life.  

Exercise- 3 easy miles.  After yesterday I wanted to take it easy and not push myself.  My food pod for my garmin was acting kinda wonky so it says I did more than I actually did.  I did run 3 miles though.  I'm up to 4.3 the whole time.  Tuesday I am going to push it up to 4.4 and see how long I can last.  Pretty soon I am going to be doing some speed work, but for now I will take little ups in my time.  Considering that I started running in.... check facebook for posts about running... April and I could barely run a minute- I think that's progress.

Food- breakfast was yogurt and pumpkin spice granola... love pumpkin spice!  Lunch was an awesome salad!  Someone let have apples, blueberries and cottage cheese- perfect to go along with my spinach, almonds, carrots, raisins, chicken and avocado.

We went to earth fare for dinner.  I love Thursdays cause the kids eat free.  I love love love their sushi!

While I was there I got stuff to make egg salad and ended up making deviled eggs too.
I talked with my dad some more today about buying half a cow this fall.  Theresa and I are also going to the farmers market after the race on Saturday.  I am really excited about being healthy and buying local produce and meat.

Is it rude when you are beside someone on the treadmill at the gym and you look at their display to see how they are doing?

On a different note

Today kinda sucked.

Exercise- When I got to the gym (our really small one at work that is free so I know it's stupid to complain) both treadmills were being used.  I did about 4 minutes on the elliptical, 10 shoulder presses and a lot of pouting.  It didn't take long before they were open, but my body wasn't feeling the running.  I still did 3 miles... some walking, some jogging and some sprinting.  I actually stretched afterward.
Food- At least food was good today.  I had an amazing breakfast with tempeh, egg, cheese and avocado.  Lunch was more leftovers of chicken curry.  I went shopping after the run and got some stuff to make salad.  I got a rotisserie chicken from Earth Fare and threw it on the salad with carrots, avocado(duh), strawberries,almonds and some raspberry vinaigrette.  The salad was baby spinach- really happy I liked it.

On the way to the store this lady cut me off and I called her stupid.  Austin preceded to tell me that stupid is a bad word... I know buddy, but some people need to learn how to drive.  I'm sure he will call someone at day care stupid and I will have to own that one too...

I got bad news on the relationship front too... better yet lack of relationship.  I thought I was on the verge of something good, but now he's moving...

This makes it all better.  Avocado goodness with bubbles.  I think I ate a whole avocado today... at least.

Also today... I gave up caffeine. Mostly on accident, but I think it's a good change.  I couldn't decide if I should use artificial sweetener or sugar and extra calories.  I couldn't decide so coffee never happened today. If I can make it one day, I can quit.  But yet another reason I am crabby, still in my workout clothes and about to just crash.  Tomorrow will be better, or at least next week.

I didn't even have to use my A.K.

I gotta say it was a good day. Yes I am a dork and I love 90's music.  

Exercise- I ran 3 miles in less than 40 min.  My heart rate was not through the roof either.  It felt so good!  

Food- For lunch I had left overs of the mostly organic chicken curry.  Snack was toast with my almond butter.  Dinner- I ventured out with a recipe for tempeh bacon from Matt at the Athlete's plate.  I made a sandwich with cheese and avocado.  It was really tasty.  My kids tried a bite and asked for more too!!  It feels good to be eating better and my kids are liking it too.

I talked a lot today with my friends at work about the eating change.  I am happy to have their support.  One of them already eats a lot like I want to.  The other, like me, is making small changes toward it.  I am loving finding new sources of inspiration and hopefully can become an inspiration to others.  

I am addicted to another blog- hungryrunnergirl  I am totally loving reading through her archives.  I love her realistic approach to eating.  She eats what she likes, luckily it's mostly healthy stuff.  If she wants candy or other sweets, she eats them too.  It's all in moderation and she works out HARD!  I also love her pictures because she's always cheesing for the camera.  

I feel really happy and at peace today.  I really love my life.  I think that everything is coming together.  It's about to get crazy, but I think that it will be a lot of fun.  If anything I will have a many stories that start out with "You remember that one time where I thought I could work full time, go to school full time, raise two kids on my own, take one of them to football and soccer and still try to have a life?"

You are what you eat

I've been thinking a lot about ways to improve my life.  I have been making a lot of changes... running, school, routines, and trying to change the way I eat.  At first I just wanted to watch what I ate, not any drastic changes, just eat a little better.  I have been looking for blogs about running, but whenever you read about running- you read about eating.  One of my favorites that I can stop reading is The Athletes Plate.  He's hilarious and has a really good way of looking at food.  The two things really go hand in hand.  It makes sense- you have to have energy to run.  I can really tell what I ate when I run.  I am not sure if I am going to go hard core organic, but I am definitely going to take steps toward it(even if they are baby steps).  I just made some almond butter.  It felt really good to make something myself and to know exactly what was in it. I got some bread at earth fare and made peanut butter toast.  It really is crazy to me what is in our food.  I watched Food Inc about a year ago.  It freaked me out.  I wanted to throw all the food in my house away.  That was the starting point, but in combination with other changes in my life, I now realize how important it is.  I want to be healthy.  I want to be fit.  I want to know exactly what I am eating.  I can spend less eating better at home than I have been eating CRAP.  Seriously... click on nutrition when you bring the link up. Chicken-ish nuggets? I'm not saying I'm never going to eat at McDonald's again.  I'm not saying I will never eat another "chicken" nugget again.  All I'm saying is that I want to do better.  I want to make better decisions more of the time.  Maybe, eventually, I will make a whole life change- I could see that happening, eventually.

On a less positive note, Austin threw up in my car.  My car that has less than 2000 miles on it has already been thrown up in.  My dream car, that I have kept clean since purchasing it, had puke running down the back seat.  My car is fine now.  Austin WAS feeling better, but threw up this morning at day care.  I had to leave work to go pick him up... at least he didn't throw up in my car again.  We are at home relaxing, he is relaxing and I am staring at the pile mountain of clothes that I need to fold.  I promise I will fold them when I post this.

Positively Lucky

I am a positive person.  That statement does not seem strange, and most people probably think the same thing about themselves.  It is strange to me.  I was never that person.  I was never a person to see a glass half full and if it just did happen to be half full, someone was bound to spill it.  I had a bad attitude and well, misery loves company.  I have tried to push everyone in my life away and have been quite successful at times.  Some of the most important people in my life, at some point, I swore I would never talk to again.  They stuck around or came back later... who knows why, but they did.  I say this a lot, but I am certain that I am one of the luckiest people alive.  However strange it may be though, it's not hard.  I chose to be a positive person.  I chose to live a happy life.  People suck and yes misery loves company, but guess what- misery ends up alone or surrounded by other miserable people(not fun).  I cannot control how people around me act.  I can, however, control how I let those people affect me.  I make a choice everyday to be happy(well ok, most days). I chose to fill my life with other positive people.  I become a better person by lifting others up.  I become better by inspiring people because they end up being an inspiration to me.  I just hope the people in my life feel half as lucky to be in my life, as I do theirs.

Because of her

Because of her...

I believe in love.  I see the love for us in her eyes.  I never understood how much she loved me until I had kids.  I feel lucky everyday that someone loves me as much as I love my children.  Her first two marriages didn't work out, but she believed enough to try again.  She found a man that makes her the happiest she has ever been.  I believe in love and third chances, because of her.

I know I can.  No one believes in me like my mother.  It is with her support that I have tackled some of my biggest challenges.  She has been one my biggest supporters in going back to school.  I will have a bachelors degree, because of her.

I know I'm beautiful.  It doesn't matter what I am wearing or what size I am.  I know that I am always beautiful in my mother's eyes.  I have self confidence, because of her.

I care for others.  My mother lives to take care of others.  In her day job she takes care of her boss.  At any other time, including work hours, she takes care of her family.  She does so much for her parents, her kids and her grandchildren.  We could not ask for a better daughter, mother or maw-maw. I put others before myself, because of her.

I see the brighter side of life.  My mom has been through a lot.  She went to three different schools in 8th grade, but she made it through(not without worrying, but still made it).  She has had ups and down in her family life, but she made it through.  I know there will be a better tomorrow, because of her.

I forgive.  I won't put any details about this, but if you know my mom- you know this is true.  I know there is no point in holding a grudge, because of her.

I know someone is always there.  I talk to my mom everyday, most days about 17 times.  I know she will listen whether it is something big, or if I have nothing at all to say.  I will never be alone, because of her.

slacker no more

I figure that writing this out and keeping myself accountable will help me in actually reaching my goals. 

• I am starting fly lady today.  I will do it everyday... at least the 15 minute goals.  The only days I will cut myself some slack are Mondays when I start school
• I will stick to my running training plan.  There is no excuse to not run at least 3 miles 5 days a week.  I am starting a 5k training plan to up my speed on August 22nd.  Monday will be one of my off days, so again, no excuses.
• I will make all A's in school.  The only class that I will be ok with getting a B is my science class. 
• I will not procrastinate when it comes to homework or class assignments. 
• We are going to have a strict bed time routine during the week.  Bed time will start at 7:15(already set an alarm) unless we are not home due to games or practices. 
• This includes trying to get Austin out of pullups at night
• Brush teeth
• Potty
• Pajamas
• Book 1 long or 2 short
• Bed
• I will have a bed time routine.  My routine will start at 8:30
• rinse/floss/brush teeth
• set clothes out including work out clothes for the next day... this means i have to start laundry as soon as I get home
• make lunch and snacks for the next day
• I will not eat out in August, unless Theresa wants to go out for her birthday.  Maybe I can convince her to just let me make her lasagna

This is what I am pushing for now.  I will call them my half year resolutions.  These are things I cannot let slack.  I will be better by the end of this year and can push for even more next year. 

Lazy Days

I love my lazy days just hanging out at my house.  I have a feeling I am really going to miss them come August 22nd. I am super excited about all that I am going to be up to this fall, but it's going to be crazy. Austin and I had a lot of fun putting together Legos.  I am glad he is liking them as much as I hoped he would.  I am glad we have that in common.  I see many Lego projects in our future.  Megan decided she was going to have a little(large actually) fashion show.  I really think she changed twelve times(not exaggerating).  I have NO idea where she got her girly-ness from.  She loves purses, hair bows, dresses, shoes... this chick has more shoes than I do!  I'm glad that she has my mom to do all that stuff with because I am at a loss when it comes to that.  I will support her no matter what she wants to do, but lets just hope she doesn't love dance as much as I think she's going to.  Hopefully, if she is, she will do hip hop or something that will be more fun to watch...   Austin will be doing football and soccer this fall.  I hope the practice and game schedules don't conflict.  He is really into soccer, but I think he's going to enjoy football too.  My dad is super excited about the football, so excited that he paid for it all!  That helped out a lot!!  I loved today, but looking forward to busier days.

I run

I'm not the fastest, but I love to run.  We ran the twilight 5k today... it was still sunny.  This was the first time I ran a race that had any hills.  Hills suck, just sayin.  I love the community I have become a part of just because I put on a pair of shoes and started seeing how far I could go.  On the first day I thought a minute was hard.  Today I know I can run 3 miles.  OK so maybe not today, but inside on the treadmill.  I want to keep pushing myself to see just how much I can do.  I will do many more races, many more miles, and eventually run a marathon.
I run away from the stress of a bad day.
I run towards a better tomorrow.
I run to lift the weight off my shoulders.
I run to be able to play with my children.
I run.

zoom-zoom

Things I love about my car.

• Sirius radio.  I love that I can switch between pop, country, 80's  etc. I never have to listen to a song that I don't particularly like,  just because it is the best song on.  The 90's station is the best... seriously obsessed with it.
• Cool factor... Let's be honest- I need all the help I can get.  When I tell people that I drive a stick they think it's pretty bad ass.  I am often called bad and an ass, but never a "bad ass."
• Shifting... I actually don't mind traffic because it just gives me another reason to shift.  I'm sure that will wear off eventually, but it definitely makes driving more tolerable.
•  Zoom-Zoom... The screen actually says zoom zoom when I get in the car.  Like I said, it's the little things

 

And just to let you know... It's still clean!  It may not seem like an impressive feat for most people, but for me it's a lot.  I actually removed a cup, after I drank it, as soon as I got out of the car!!

That's my son

One of the many things I will answer to is "Austin's Mom." I am the mother of the child that says GD at daycare.  He didn't get that one from me.... Fuck on the other hand, I had to claim that one.  I am the one rearing this little boy that chews on his shirt until almost the whole front is wet.  That is one of the most DISGUSTING things in the whole ENTIRE world.  I had to tell him no hugs from mommy with a wet shirt.  My boy got put in "the blue chair"(aka time out, but they can't call it that) at daycare for kicking another kid.  While in said "blue chair" he falls out and bumps his head.  He definitely gets that from his mama.  I might just be the clumsiest person alive.  This child loves to make this sound that I imagine could only come from him or a Pterodactyl(never would have spelled it that way).  I am almost positive that he's made my ears bleed... on multiple occasions.  THAT GETS ON MY EFFIN NERVES... and yes that bad.  On the other hand(a much better hand), I get to see that little boy smile every day.  He has one of the brightest smiles I have ever seen. I have to force myself not to cave when he tries to suck up. He gives me the best hugs and kisses me on the cheek then says, "I love you mommy."  He often tells me that I'm so cute.  I can see in his big brown eyes that he cares when he gets in trouble.  I know he wants to do the right thing... it's just hard for him sometimes.  He is getting better everyday.  I am so proud to be "Austin's Mom."

I didn't want kids

           Before you, I didn't see myself as a mother.  

       Before you, I didn't think of myself as incomplete. 

I thought that I could live my life without children and be complete. I probably would have been perfectly content, but I had no idea what I was missing. Truth is- there was no life before you.

 

Life began while you were growing inside me. I knew my life would change, from the first kicks and the times where I could see your hiccups.  Giving birth was the most pain I have ever been in, but every ounce of it was worth it.  I get to see you grow, hear you speak and see you become your own little people.  Nothing has made my heart swell more than hearing you tell me you love me.

You make me melt with just one look.  When you accomplish anything, I feel like something I am doing is working.  Now that I have you, I am a part of something bigger than myself.  Seeing how independent you are lets me know I am teaching you how to be real people.  Not holding your hand through everything lets me know that you will be able to take care of yourself.  I will be there for you no matter when or where, but I know you will be strong.

Not to say that someone else's life would be incomplete if they did not have a child, but i think that I was meant to be a mom.  Austin, at your first birthday party, while I was also pregant with Megan, I danced with you.  That was one of the best dances I have ever had(the other was with my dad at my wedding).  My mom told me that I had never looked happier.  It was not about who was at the party, where the party was, definitely not who I was married to, but about how much I loved that little boy I was dancing with.  You made me a better person. Then, Megan, you were born.  I instantly loved you as much as your brother.  You made me that much better.

Being a mother made me a better person.  Everything I do is for you.  I want to be a better me so I can be the best mother I can be for you.